Our Black Reading Corner

With everything going on in the world I wanted to find a way to connect with the boys and teach them BLACK history as well as to help them understand the beauty in their skin. Reading has always been a fun escape for me I get lost in reading. I randomly said you know what I’m going to create an age appropriate Black Reading corner for the boys.

What do I mean by black? I mean black characters, authors and illustrators. Why? Well I could only compare my child hood to how the boys are being raised currently. I grew up knowing I was black but I was insecure about my skin about my hair everything about me. Although I was being raised by beautiful strong black woman and men I would go into other spaces or simply watch to much Disney where majority of the characters didn’t look like me or come from similar backgrounds.

I was in shock to find so many good books on amazon. I ordered the books right away and purchased the acrylic floating shelves from amazon. I preferred the shelves because Mahir is 2 and I was sure if I purchased a book shelf he would climb it. The books ranged from $3.99-$16.99. I added in a chair we had around the house from Ikea and boom it was complete.

I wanted to be sure that my children would not only actively read but read to understand. Words mean nothing if you aren’t taking your time to imagine the vision of what your reading. Reading became more personal after attending an HBCU. During undergrad I learned myself and began to appreciate and own what being black truly is.

Excuse me for the language but you won’t feel me unless I slide this tea in. One of my favorite poems “Fuck I look like” by Kai Davis she says “White people told us niggas not to read 300 years ago, and now niggas telling other niggas not to read, what are we afraid of”. When I listened to those words back in 2012 it spoke to me not only do I enjoy reading but my ancestors where purposely told not to read in fear of what WE could become. This is not to make everything racial or political but to inform others.

I’m teaching my boys daily that reading is cool and that the mind should never stop expanding and growing. This is not to knock others culture rather your Irish, Latino or in between giving our children diverse books or books they can relate to sets them up for a future of being confident in who they are and where they come from.

My favorites so far are “Woke Baby” by Mahogany Browne. This read is perfect for children 3 and under. My favorite for ages 5 and up would be “I am Positive affirmations for brown boys” by Ayesha Rodriguez. This book was essential with the current state in America with black lives matter and police brutality. I wanted my son to know he is valuable, loved and a King. What are you guys reading lately?

Fitness while Pregnant

I know, I know how dare me just show up with a random Tip Tuesday and not explain why I been gone so long and not consistent. Welp, this pregnancy has gotten the best of me but that’s a story for a different day. SOON! On today we are going to talk pregnancy and fitness I’m sharing five of my tips.

1. Find what works for you- I’ve tried pregnancy yoga which is not for me I just but then I took my normal aerobics routine and cut out ab workouts and notice that my body prefers that more than being zen. Even if your thing is walking start with maybe doing a slight 15 min a day.

2. Me time- When I’m at the gym yes people stare because of my belly but I’m pregnant not an alien. It’s completely normal to hit gym while pregnant just in moderation. Gives me my time to think ohhh and be toddler free to catch up on Greys Anatomy .

3. Labor and delivery- I delivered Kai at 35 weeks, he came out 7lbs 8 oz which is pretty big for a baby at his gestational age. The one thing I remember clearly is labor being a breeze 5 hrs. I can say remaining active was a big help during my labor I was able to push without getting tired and I was able to fight through majority of my contractions. I even went hiking in LA at 6 months pregnant last time.

4. Hydrate- I recommended just taking a whole gallon to the gym yes you will go potty a lot but you and baby will be hydrated. Being dehydrated can sometimes cause contractions I’ve learned the hard way.

5. Know your limits- Look your growing life so your goal should be to just be active and healthy. Don’t try to feed into social media and be the pregnant woman with abs.

Just get going, don’t wait. I will admit it’s easiest to workout during second trimester. I’m no fitness guru but I know what works for me and I hope these tips can help you.

Bonus Tip: The more active you are during pregnancy the easier snapping back will be.

Mommy & Kai take on Disneyland

Growing up I spent many holidays in Los Angeles with my family. I remember when we all packed up and went to Disney the only problem was I was afraid of rides and characters at the time.

My little one has had an obsession with Mickey Mouse since he could stand and we had already went to Disney on Ice countless times so what was next? Disneyland. Off we went on a 6am flight landed at LAX breakfast then on to Disneyland. What was even greater is that our tickets to the park where free talk about a savings and they came with fast pass so no waiting in line.

The park had plenty of rides for my little one who is thirty five inches tall. From turkey legs to the tea cups we had a blast. So much of a blast I looked into his stroller at only 7pm and he was sleeping mouth open and all.

I left the theme park with memories to last a life time. To see his smile and him jumping for joy was well worth the exhaustion that my body is feeling right now. Now we are on to Knotts Berry Farm to see Snoopie.

Mommy Maintenance

Mommy Maintenance

Before having Kai I was that girl who would never leave the house in sweats. Hair would be done, closet stocked with garments ohhhhh how have things changed. I will run out the house in yoga pants and a messy bun in a min. The one thing I couldn’t cut ties with in my maintenance routine is my nail spa days. It has been one of my favorite places my entire life. I feel so relaxed calmed and at peace. I prepare days before going to Pinterest to find the color and shape that I want to try next just gets me excited. Below I give my me time tips and tricks.

  1. Making time I usually find the time to go to my nail shop during the week after work while the toddler is at school, It gives me a much-needed break before I’m back in the world of MOMMY
  2. I take my iPad I could be watching Netflix or Hulu, or even reading
  3. I don’t answer my phone, I think its rude to my nail tech as well as this place is the most peace and quite I get for the week.
  4. THE MASSAGE – You know I’m paying extra for more time, I haven’t gotten a good sleep since 2014.

For me my safe haven may be the nail shop for you it could be the gym, library or something more simple like a glass of wine when the little ones are sleep. Finding that thing or place that allows moms to break free and relax for even just a second is necessary. I’m guilty of letting myself go in many ways after having a child. Motherhood can be overwhelming and demanding don’t be afraid to award yourself every once in a while. Until next time.

Yasss…They have kids too

Yasss…They have kids too

Being a mother comes first in my life. I mean as soon as I wake and my feet hit the ground I’m in full mommy mode. So it comes to no surprise that my social life is non existent. I get invited to many blogging events and most aren’t kid friendly and just conflict with my mommy schedule. I work full time so after work its time to cook, clean and prepare for the next day. Then weekends are split between birthday parties, toddler events and SOCCER, yes I’m a soccer mom.

Well some how me and Lami became Facebook friends through mutual friends and she said she wanted to start blogging. Well you know me I was like go for it honey. Blogging is therapeutic as well as a way to start a mini business. I’m all for seeing other woman win. Well fast forward her blog @themillennialmuva launches.(Which is amazing please check it out). She starts a Instagram chat of beautiful talented black woman so that we can build a sisterhood and collaborate. Wednesday she suggest we all meet up and I say lets all go to Jupiter. Jupiter is a really good modern breakfast place in the Sugarland Square.

As meet up day approaches I’m running out of babysitter opitions. I decided Kai will have to go with me. Not knowing how others would feel about my active two year old joining our evening brunch. I waited until the day of to announce that I was bringing him along. To my surprise other woman in the chat replied “I’m bringing mine to” it was such a relief to hear I could have twerked. So now I’ve charged every electronic device, packed snacks and grabbed anything else that could possibly entertain him and we hit the road to get to the brunch. I knew with Kai coming I’d need to get there early settle him and have like a 1-2-3 talk “Don’t embarrass me, unless you want a pop pop”. In walks Shawna so I immediately introduce myself and apologize for my toddler running wild we had been placed in  private room and Kai was burning off energy. She didn’t seem to be bothered as the table filled with beautiful faces in walked Chenelle with her adorable two I leaped for joy like “Yasss I’m not alone”. Shawna was so sweet organized all the kids to one side of the table. Lami and her two came and were seated we had a full on party.

Somehow even with the children there with us they were not a distraction. We even forgot they were there. The TV was purposely changed to Disney. We sat at that big wooden table for hours just listening to one another’s goals and visions. We where productive holding each other accountable for what we want to do how to get there.

Towards the end I glanced over at my sleeping child and he had spaghetti sauce all over his face. Seemed like no one noticed which was hilarious. I cleaned his face and continued in conversation. Then as we left and went our separate ways I was driving home to nap of course and hit me. We all came together learned each others strengths and weaknesses as small business owners all down to encourage, lend a helping hand in any way possible. We all live busy lives weather we are students, moms or work multiple jobs but a few things were made clear you have to be determined to win every day, the desire to win has to mean more than desire to take easy routes. But you truly win, when your whole team wins. Who cares if we have kids that not going to stop us and the fact that I found woman who don’t mind kids and some even have children of their own I’m forever grateful for.

In conclusion “Who ever said you can’t have it all, must not have been a mom”.

Why I regret saying “I want a BOY”

They say be careful what you wish for or you just might get it. From childhood I would always say “I want my first child to be a boy”.Even when I got pregnant my first thought was I hope and know that this child is a boy.

img_0831-2Modern day we even throw gender reveal parties to announce the babies gender before arrival. Cute and catchy themes like tutu’s or football’s.

I remember the day I found out the gender. Impatient at 13 weeks I paid a specialist to do a gender scan and 3D DVD. Well after 2min the specialist said “well this little fella isn’t shy it’s a …….Boy”.Instantly I cried tears of joy, I skipped right over a gender reveal and called everyone to announce the news.

Everyone congratulated me saying boys are the best. Their easy to raise but hard to shop for. I thought of all the sports he would play even went as far as selecting a future jersey number.

We began to select names, buy clothes and even decorate his nursery. As a first time mother I was excited I felt prepared reading all the books taking parenting classes. We would talk and try to guess who he would look like and act like.

Which brings me to my biggest regret. Now that I’m a mother and I’ve changed thousands of diapers, nursed him, watched him take his first steps and so much more. It hit me I prayed specifically for a boy selfishly. Why did his gender even matter. I should have been more focused on having healthy child.

Now that I’m a more seasoned parent I can say I’ll never put so much energy on a specific gender. Being able to naturally conceive and carry a child to turn is a journey, some never get that experience. I’m more than thankful for where this journey has taken me and honestly with the next little one I rather the gender be a surprise. I encourage everyone to understand if you have a boy a girl, if you carried naturally, had in-vitro or adopted each child/baby is truly designed and intended for you no matter the timing or the gender. I love my son unconditionally not because of his gender but because he the very best part of me.

hoUSton August 28

hoUSton August 28

I must admit that this is something that you can’t prepare for, something you could never guess was coming. To see a city that have grown to love over the past seven years under water still doesn’t feel like reality. Not being able to go to the grocery store, school or down the road due to flood waters. Hearing tornado sirens all through the night, the amount of uncertainty that we’ve experienced these past five days. Being a young mom to a toddler and remaining calm in the situation but I’m forever grateful.

 

To see a family with a young child carrying everything they own in a pack and play my heart broke into pieces. I will never take the simple things for granted. Which brings us to today we have gathered our family we will volunteer. We will help in any way to rebuild our city and we will continue to pray. Yes many can not donate this we understand but if you can pray or even be a helping hand. hoUSton will show this country how to come together no matter race, ethnicity or sexual orientation. For all those who have reached out thank you.